Warning! If you do not like potty talk or TMI type posts – do not continue reading. Today, I’m dishing out the straight scoop about poop and the gas we pass. The truth is your poop can tell you a lot about your health. So can the gas you pass. Let’s talk about poop and gas, shall we?!
Do you know anyone who can drop a fart bomb that will clear a room? Ever have someone in your home reek up the bathroom so bad it intoxicates the whole house? Do you keep 1 or 2 air fresheners in each bathroom, plus air spray or even scented candles? Do you have the ‘belchies’? You know where you belch all the time especially after meals? Do you spend an entire evening out uncomfortable because of gas that you have to hold in to avoid the embarrassment of what may come out should you not hold back? Maybe you find yourself excusing yourself to the bathroom a bunch of times to let your gas pass in the toilet. OR maybe, you’ve got the SBD’s, ‘silent but deadlies’. You know you can let one rip without anyone hearing it, but they’ll definitely smell it and that could potentially draw attention to you. Unless, you are the first one to say; ‘Oh man, what’s that smell?‘ Of course, you don’t want to be uncomfortable, right?!
Do you have to run to the toilet often to avoid an accident or sharting in your pants? Maybe, you’ve actually had to go home from work early due to a little ‘shart’ accident. OR, Do you sit on the toilet forever waiting for your bowels to move but all you can squeeze out is a little rabbit terd? Maybe you sit on the toilet forever only to have an incomplete bowel movement and have to wipe a lot anyway. Do you sit in the can for 30 minutes at a time thinking that’s how long it should take? Or maybe, you alternate between pushing out those pellet poos to having the floodgates open wide, no holds barred. Do you have white poop? Gray poop? Or multi-colored poop? Is your poop ever alarmingly red, like there is blood in it? (better double check and make sure you didn’t just eat some beets recently). Is your poop a different consistency every time you go? Maybe your poo has undigested food in it. Or perhaps it’s a bunch of tiny terds compiled into one log. Or maybe you have what you call ‘pencil poops’. Do you ever eat a meal and then have to go number two urgently? Ever wonder about that? I wonder if most people even know what constitutes a healthy poo.
On a more serious note: Perhaps your bowel movement actually hurt on the way out. Maybe you’ve experienced a time when it was too big to find it’s way out. That should not be the case. Perhaps you move your bowels and you are left feeling a raw sensation inside. This is not funny stuff. Bloody stools are scary stuff too. Consistent Black black poop, poop with blood and yellow poop are worth calling a doctor who knows how to help. These colors are not normal and you should consider getting a Complete Digestive Stool Analysis done to rule out serious pathologies.
The ‘Perfect Dump’ actually does exist. Every once in awhile you may have experienced it, but really it should happen most every day. You may sit down expecting the worst, but what you get is a smooth sliding, fartless masterpiece that breaks the water with the splashless grace of an expert diver. But that’s not the end of it. When you go to wipe you find out that it was totally unnecessary. This experience (the one you really should have every day) makes you feel that all is right with the world and you are in perfect harmony. Euphoria overcomes you and a smirk remains on your face as you exit the bathroom. You might even be so elated you have to tell someone (though I doubt most people ever do). ~Inspiration for this section
Back in high school we had names for different kinds of poop. There were the ‘Hang Ten poopies’, the turtle head poops, the ‘use the whole roll to wipe poops’, ‘liquid poo’, the ‘loosey goosies’ and the list could go on. Maybe you can recall hearing one of the men in your life say, ‘I’ve gotta go pinch a loaf’, ‘drop a toilet bomb’ or ‘load the crapper’. I’m trying to provide a little hilarity to an otherwise serious and uncomfortable topic. Most people do not ever discuss their bowel issues in a constructive way, and often may just tolerate ‘crappy poops’. Or they just spend their lives making jokes about poo. (which can be rather funny, I’ll admit) Maybe you are just chalking up your less than stellar poo as ‘normal’. Or maybe, you are afraid to talk to a doctor about it because they’ll make you get a colonoscopy or some other invasive procedure to see what the issue may be. What if the trouble you’re having in the bathroom could be resolved by learning some basic things about digestion along with some tips on how to get your bowels to come out clean as a whistle, easy with no straining and not stink up the whole house? Healthy daily poop is a relief in more ways than one. And, it can help to prevent serious health issues from setting in down the road. I take my poop very seriously. (I also live with 4 boys and hear about farts and poop endlessly-it’s like an assumed aspect of male communication).
Have you been searching for the answers to your bathroom issues without finding any lasting resolution? There are many people who don’t want to talk to anyone about “potty issues” not even to their doctors unless they have to. Heal Your Gut, an innovative online course tackles the basics on how to get your digestion running optimally. This course is discrete, personal, and cheaper than a trip to a GI. To get a little glimpse into the course, feel free to check out the sample lesson on Proper Elimination.
Perhaps you’ve got chronic diarrhea, diarrhea shortly after meals, black or tarry colored stools, undigested food in your stool, belching or gas within one hour of eating, greasy or shiny stools, hemorrhoids, itchy anus, stools that are hard to pass, less than one bowel movement per day, stools with corners or edges, flat or ribbon shaped, not well formed or loose, blood in your stool, mucus in your stool, excessive foul smelling lower bowel gas -these are all signs and symptoms of some of the foundations of your health being out of balance. This course will help you to figure out why you are experience poopy problems as well as teach you how to work to resolve the issues mentioned and more.
Here is a testimonial post from a client of mine who suffered from severe ulcerative colitis. We were able to resolve the colitis issues and she is on her way to healing her gut from two different autoimmune conditions. You can read the beginning of her journey and working with me –HERE. Also, you can listen to a recording of us talking about her health journey one year later –HERE! And here is another brief testimonial from a course participant with ‘bathroom issues‘;
I wasn’t going to take the course initially even though the subject interested me because I felt I really didn’t have the time to invest in another e-course. I changed my mind after spending a miserable day bloated and nauseous from not having had a bowel movement in two and a
half weeks. I have not regretted taking the course since that day.
I highly recommend this course for anyone who has “bathroom issues”. I personally have struggled all my life with constipation. I tried everything with no lasting success. I had no idea that I had low stomach acid plus being deficient in essential minerals. Everything is clicking on why every solution I tried wouldn’t last past a few weeks.
Thank you so much for teaching this course! You have given me the keys to heal not only my gut, but my health as well. Bless you! ~ Marcella
Ready to get some help so you can get rid of your ‘bathroom issues’? And in all seriousness, get your digestive system working more optimally, along with hundreds of other people! Sign up and read more by clicking the banner below!
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